My first immersion in the world of hair hair toppers

As you probably know if you follow my YouTube channel Comme un diadème and my Blog, I crossed the hair topper threshold at the age of 30. Suffering from androgenic alopecia since the age of 20, I was starting to feel really bad about losing my hair. But taking this step is far from easy. It took me several years to feel psychologically ready to do it. I went through different phases, and catastrophic fitting sessions, before I really felt ready to move forward. I tell you all about it in this article.

First step: I discover the existence of hair hair toppers.

The first few years after my diagnosis of androgenetic alopecia, I didn't know that there could be solutions other than Minoxidil or heavy hormonal treatments (Androcure). I did not know at all about the existence of toppers capillary clips. I had never seen or heard of them. I did know about wigs, however.

But in my mind, these were products for very old people, which were not natural at all. So I had never considered this option. Moreover, the wig was, according to me, intended for women in a more "extreme" situation than mine with regard to their alopecia (bald women, or facing cancer treatments for example).

But as my alopecia progressed and the complex that came with it, I sometimes spent evenings on forums for men with baldness (yes yes...I was there!). On these forums, some men would sometimes say that women were at least lucky to have the toppers clips at their disposal. Sometimes, I also saw some women intervening to ask for information on this type of solution (toppers glued or with clips, wigs).

So that's when I first heard about hair toppers. So I started to look into the subject and soon came across a YouTube video of a young woman trying on a hair topper in a shop in Canada. This young woman must have been barely 25 years old. She had visible alopecia, but it was fairly mild. She tried the hair topper and the result was incredibly natural. It made her look so much better. I could easily identify with her because of her age, but also because her alopecia was not so marked. I said to myself that if she allowed herself this type of product, why not me?

At that time, I didn't really feel ready to wear a hair topper . I also knew that my alopecia was barely visible. I had never had any comments or insistent looks before. However, this video helped me a lot psychologically. Because I told myself "there is a solution for me, if one day it gets worse". I also promised myself that if one day the complex became too important for me to manage psychologically, I should not hesitate to go to topper. I should not make myself unhappy with a complex that can be resolved. I should be able to gauge when it becomes necessary for me.

I discuss the subject with my relatives

I was very quick to tell my friends and family about toppers . I certainly needed to have the idea validated, to have some sense of approval on what I might have to consider one day.

I first told one of my best friends about it and she reacted very well. She didn't seem shocked by what I was showing her. I explained to her that if one day my alopecia progressed, I might have to resort to this type of product. She told me that the result was very natural and successful and that it could indeed be a good solution for me.

However, I also told my mother, who had a big reaction of rejection. She reacted quite badly. I felt it was really something shameful for her. She said to me "but you're not going to wear that!!?", "but it's a wig, you're not going to wear a wig! That's for women who lose their hair, Laure.

She also told me that the result on the young woman did not look natural at all, that it showed. In short, she made me doubt a lot. I felt that it would also be a shame for her if I wore this type of product. I didn't feel supported at the time. I showed her this video on and off for a few years and I still had the same reaction of rejection.

I know today that without this, I would have certainly crossed the threshold faster, maybe even only a few months later. But instead, I waited 4 years. The time it took for the complex to become psychologically untenable for me.

I have no choice but to move on.

Over the years, I started to have a real complexion. Especially after the birth of my daughter, when I lost a lot of hair. I didn't take pictures of myself with my daughter any more because all I could see was my baldness.

It was becoming more and more difficult for me to mask this with densifying powder, especially when I was shooting my videos for YouTube. Then I remembered my promise. I tell myself it's time to give it a try and go to a wig shop.

This is not an easy step. I am ashamed to call, ashamed to go, ashamed to be seen in front of the shop in the street, ashamed to go in... but I did it!

A catastrophic first fitting!

I started to do some research and went to a shop in Paris whose name I had found on Google. I went there with my partner and my daughter who was about a year old at the time. I remember thinking to myself "poor baby with a mummy going to a wig shop". I know this is a ridiculous thought. It's nothing to be ashamed of. But that's how I felt.

The shop was not actually in a street, but at the back of a backyard. This should have reassured me, but it actually reinforced my idea that I was really doing something shameful. I felt like I was going to a brothel or a sex shop, in short, something you really want to hide.

I was greeted rather coldly by a saleswoman, who installed me in a small room of barely 3 m2, without windows. There was no wallpaper or paint on the wall, like in a normal living room. There was a lot of clutter, like in a room where you store stocks. I remember that I had the feeling of entering a storeroom!

The saleswoman went to get me a hair topper, brought it to me and left the room. I don't really understand what is happening to me at this point. She didn't give me any advice or help me position it. So I find myself alone with a product in my hands that doesn't suit me at all. My hair is wavy and orange, the colour of Dalida! It's also extremely shiny. It looks like synthetic hair. I try to position the product on my head. The result is catastrophic. I feel like they got it out of a Halloween costume shop (or Dalida's). My partner looks at me with wide eyes. Fortunately, the ridiculousness of the situation makes me laugh.

When the saleswoman returns, I tell her that the colour is really too different from mine. She tells me that's all there is to it. I find her extremely cold. I decide to leave. On the street, I feel like crying. It's not just a fitting that goes wrong. For me, it's also the only solution I had to deal with my fading alopecia. I really had to take the heat for it.

One year later...

After this disastrous episode, I didn't know what to think. The brand I went to was not one of the market leaders. They were supposed to be a bit cheaper and that's why I had selected them. I thought maybe that was the problem and that there are better products out there.

One day at work, a young colleague with beautiful hair looked at my thinning scalp while I was talking at the coffee break. I can see in her eyes that she is concerned about the state of my scalp. It's a humiliation and a real wake-up call for me, I understand that I'm at a stage where now others are noticing. I can't stay like this. As long as it was just me seeing it, I was fine. But I can't bear the thought of people noticing. So I decide to make another appointment at a wig shop and go to one of the market leaders.

This time the shop is in the middle of the street and there is a window with wigs in front of it. I remember that I didn't dare go in. I was ashamed that people would see me and wonder why I was going in there. I was ashamed that people knew I needed this. But I did it!

I find that there are some things that are quite destabilizing when you enter this type of store for a woman with simple androgenetic alopecia. At the reception, there were magazines with almost only women inside who were completely bald because of total alopecia. Or testimonials from women with cancer.

Of course, I understand that it is important that women facing these issues are represented. But I would also have liked to see women with simple androgenic alopecia. There were pages on toppers, adapted for women with "fine hair". But the models clearly did not have androgenetic alopecia. It made me feel like I didn't belong in that store, that I wasn't legitimate to be there.

I had the impression that I was entering a sphere very much linked to the disease, and this was not a very reassuring and positive feeling for me. I think that even for a woman who is ill or has total alopecia, things should be presented differently so that they can also live the experience better.

I was then received by a young saleswoman, who I found very friendly this time. She offered me two hair toppers. Neither of them is really my colour, but at least there is a blonde in them. Let's remember that I was coming out of the Dalida hair trauma! So I was prepared to tolerate a lot. Blonde is much blonder than my hair. I'm a dark blonde at heart, and this is a very light blonde, like the singer Angèle's colour.

The saleswoman helps me position the product. I don't recognise myself at first. I don't think it's bad, but I think it shows and it's a lot of hair. I think it changes my face and I think everyone will see the difference. The saleswoman is very professional, she reassures me a lot. She told me that I just need to get used to it a bit. And it's true that after about twenty minutes with the product on my head, I'm starting to get used to the look.

I find that the hair topper makes me look much better. I remember thinking that this is how I should have always looked!

That this hair hair topper allowed me to finally be the real me! The one who should not have suffered from alopecia. The one who would have been able to please...

It was from this reflection that day that the slogan of Comme un diadème came: "Redevenez celle que vous êtes". For that is precisely what I felt.

A few weeks later, I adopted this hair hair topper and it has completely changed my life and my relationship with alopecia.

However, looking back, I now know that it was not the right product for me. The colour was far too different to mine, I had to have my hair lightened several times and it still didn't blend well. Also, the base size was really too small as I have a very diffuse and extensive alopecia. All in all, the product was actually quite detectable. So I had to quickly change to a silk top product with a larger base. But I do not regret this first experience. It was this experience that made me want to make videos on my YouTube channel on the subject. It was that first hair topper that led me into the fabulous world of hair hair toppers.

Don't hesitate to share your first experience with the hair hair topper in the comments, it will be a real pleasure to read you!

Find toppers hair and wigs on the store:

https://commeundiademe.com/store/

Discover the YouTube channel of Comme un diadème:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgFJ9SejriuuyUGDZ6GT9kA?app=desktop