Hair topper & androgenic alopecia: the reaction of those around us after a week of daily wear.

My androgenetic alopecia was diagnosed at the age of 20. Ten years later, with a growing complex and my scalp becoming progressively thinner, I decided to wear a hair topper for the first time to mask my alopecia and finally move on.

One of the things that worried me most at the time was how those around me would react. How would my family, my partner, my friends, and my coworkers react?

First step: tell my family.

The first thing I dreaded the most was telling my parents that I had decided to get a hair topper. I was 30 years old at the time, but I was still quite young in my mind and so I often needed to have their approval on my choices.

My mother reacted quite badly. She was always telling me "but you can't wear that! It's for bald girls, Laure! She told me that I didn't need it and that I was focusing on my alopecia for nothing. For her, it was all in my head, even though it was she who had already detected my alopecia ten years earlier. I would like to point out that my alopecia was already quite advanced at the time and that considering the hair topper was quite logical at my stage. I knew much later that my colleagues had noticed my alopecia and had discussed it among themselves (humiliating to learn this).

My mother's negative reaction made me realize that what I was considering was a shameful solution for her. So it took me about four years to dare to step into a wig shop. But one day, I realized that I was the one suffering from this complex on a daily basis and that I should no longer wait for the approval of others to move forward.

My partner, on the other hand, reacted very well. I think he had noticed that I was losing my hair. He didn't judge me and told me that he liked me the way I was, but if it made me feel better, he didn't see a problem with it. Having his support in this decision was important to me. Looking back today, I don't know if I would have been able to take the plunge if I had felt that he was judging me negatively.

After discussing it with him, I decided to make an appointment to go to the boutique for a first fitting. I took a picture of myself with the hair topper. I then showed these pictures to my parents and my husband. They confirmed that the result was very natural, completely undetectable and encouraged me to take the plunge. Having that approval made me feel good, even though my mind was already made up. I was going to wear a hair topper. I wish I didn't have to go to the store alone and feel really supported for this step. But I'm also proud today to say that I was able to move forward on my own without waiting for someone to support me in my choices.

I acquire my first topper, I talk about it to my closest friends

After choosing my hair topper in store, I decided to contact the brand for a partnership. Indeed, I had a YouTube channel and I thought that it could be interesting for them. The advantage for me was to have the topper in exchange of the publication of videos on the product. I must admit that when I sent this email, I didn't really think that they would accept. I also thought that I would have to be able to assume this decision and publicly display myself with a complement hair, which was far from simple for me!

The brand quickly agreed. I then realized that some of my close friends followed my YouTube channel and would therefore find out that I was wearing this type of solution to hide my androgenic alopecia. So I decided to take the initiative and tell them about it. I thought they might take it badly if they found out at the same time as my subscribers.

I am a very modest person, so I had never discussed this complex with my friends despite the negative impact that alopecia had on my quality of life. It was therefore very difficult for me to tell them. I was ashamed to talk about my complex and thought they would pity me. I thought they might not know how to react and might instinctively try to comfort me, which would make me very uncomfortable. I didn't want them to feel sorry for me. I talked about it with a tremor in my voice to one of my best friends, while trying to appear detached. Tremors of shame and vulnerability. She reacted very well and didn't judge me at all. I felt supported.

For another friend of mine, I did it differently. I messaged her the picture of me with the hair topper and asked her what she thought of my new haircut/color. She said it looked great on me. I then told her that it was a hair topper and that I was going to post about it on YouTube. She told me that she never noticed my alopecia, but that it looked great.

My worst fear: the reaction of my coworkers.

I decided to wear the hair topper for the first time when I returned from a 3 week vacation. It was out of the question for me to tell my colleagues about my topper. I was therefore very anxious that they would detect my complement. Arriving at work from one day to the next with 3 times more hair is very complicated. You think that people are bound to notice it.

My first topper was much blonder than my hair. This was not a choice on my part. It was actually the only blonde model I was offered in the store. But the good thing was that it was a distraction. My colleagues saw a change in my hair color first and foremost. I remember one of my young colleagues who said to me when I arrived "Hi Laure! Well, you're all dolled up! Another colleague asked me if I had been to the hairdresser and told me that my new hair color looked good. She even touched my hair and asked me if I had straightened it, and I said yes (never contradict someone who asks!).

And for you, how will it work with your hair topper?

Women who are considering wearing a hair topper or a wig are often very concerned about the reaction of others. They are afraid of being detected as wearing a hair topper or wig, and of receiving derogatory comments.

But it is actually very rare for people to detect a hair prosthesis. Unless you are already almost bald and your alopecia has already been clearly noticed by your loved ones. Then yes, in that case, people will indeed be able to tell that you have switched to a prosthesis. But in cases of "classic" alopecia, i.e., visible but not so obvious to others, people will not detect anything because they do not analyze the density of our hair on a daily basis. They will certainly notice a change in your hairstyle. But they won't imagine that you are wearing a prosthesis because most of them don't even know that toppers exist.

As part of Comme un diadème, I have been proposing toppers capillaries to women with androgenic alopecia for about 3 years and I have never yet had a return from a woman whose hair topper was detected by those around her. The only rare times it has been detected is when the alopecia was really impressive (person almost bald on the top of the head) and therefore obvious before the switch to the prosthesis.

There is also another factor to consider. After a few years, you will also understand that there is nothing shameful about this product. We have the right to find a solution to a problem that causes us complex and suffering. Who would judge that negatively? Should we base our choices on the opinions of people like that? I don't think so 😉

I now regularly discuss the fact that I wear toppers with people I don't know or know very well. And I can assure you that it has always been very well received. People see me talking about my solution with ease, confidence, and pride. And when they see that, they don't want to criticize because they know that we're not trying to hide anything, but rather to restore ourselves.

And FYI, my mom is now the biggest fan of my hair supplement brand 😉

Check out the YouTube video after a week of wearing my first hair topper daily to see my reaction at the time: